Romans 12:10 says,
Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves.
As wives, we have a tendency to pull out the verse that says, "Submit to one another" even though it's not in the context of marriage, but when it comes to other verses - like this one telling us to honor one another above ourselves - suddenly it doesn't apply to our husbands anymore.
Do you honor your husband above yourself?
- When you're exhausted at the end of the day, do you consider how exhausted he might be as well?
- When he has to work on Mother's Day, do you think about his frustration that he can't be home with his family, or are you focused on the fact that you aren't getting the day you wanted?
- During a disagreement, do you consider his point of view and try to understand why he feels the way he does, or are you contemplating the next argument you'll make for your case?
It's so, so easy to fall into these human responses, and I will be the first to admit that I fall into them as well.
What God is looking for is a heart willing to recognize those as worldly responses, and willing to reject them for godly ones instead.
He offers us His strength, His love, His grace, His mercy, so that we can set out to accomplish what He's asked of us.
Honoring our husbands above ourselves isn't easy, but it's instructed of us for a reason.
If we want to have a heavenly marriage, we have to be willing to live by heavenly commandments.
I'd love to hear ways that you honor your husband. Share in the comments!
Why is respect towards our husbands SO important?
Most women want to feel loved and cherished by their husbands in the same way that husbands want to be respected by their wives.
Over the years, I've learned many reasons wives should respect their husbands. Here are my top 5.
1️⃣ God commands it.
Ephesians 5:33 - "However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband."
2️⃣ Men thrive on respect.
If a man believes his wife respects him, he usually feels like he can take on the world.
3️⃣ Men value respect over love.
Given the option between love and respect, most men would prefer to feel unloved rather than disrespected. It sounds harsh to us, because we thrive on love, but men value respect.
4️⃣ Respect communicates trust.
When you show your husband respect, it tells them you trust them to lead your family well. When you disrespect him, it tells him that you don't trust his ability to lead.
5️⃣ Men need respect to feel appreciated and valued.
In a marital conflict, most men would not say they feel unloved - they would say they feel disrespected. When wives show their husbands respect, they feel valued and appreciated.
What do you think? What other reasons would you add to this?
Do you think your husband would say that he feels respected by you?
Can you easily stop thinking negative thoughts?
If you're like most people, the answer is no.
It's not easy - it's also not impossible.
Scripture instructs us to "take captive every thought to the obedience of Christ." (2 Cor. 10:5)
But how do I do that, and how can it help my marriage?
Here are some steps to take:
1. Recognize the negative thought.
Our feelings are a result of our thoughts. If you are feeling irritable, angry, hurt, or sad, notice what thoughts you've been thinking.
2. Once you've identified the thought, ask yourself, "Is this true? Is it factual? Is it possible that this is only my opinion or perception?"
Truth is something that would hold up in a court of law. If it's open to interpretation (e.g. obviously he doesn't care, he's lazy, he's self-absorbed), then it isn't truth. Sometimes we need to ask God for wisdom and discernment to recognize the lies, because the enemy can disguise these as truth.
3. Pray over the thought and release it to God.
Thank Him for His willingness to take it from you, and for His mercy and forgiveness. Pray over your husband, or whomever else you had the negative thought. Praying for the person who hurt us can change our thoughts dramatically.
4. Replace the thought with something that is "pure, lovely, and praiseworthy" according to Philippians 4:8.
It's not enough to try and just stop thinking a negative thought. We have to replace it with a positive one. Pray over your husband, or whomever else you had the negative thought. Praying for the person who hurt us can change our thoughts dramatically. Consider their situation and view it from their point of view. Offer the same measure of grace you would offer yourself. Seek to assign positive motives for their behavior, such as they were truly trying to help, they really didn't mean to cause harm and just didn't recognize it, or they were so busy and could probably use some understanding and support.
When you change your thoughts, you change your feelings. When you feel more positive, you will treat your husband more positively. It sounds simple, but this can have such a profound effect on your marriage!
We hear all the time that we should take our thoughts captive, but the practical application and how-to are often missing.
My prayer is that these four steps will be helpful in arming you to battle against negative, false, and harmful thoughts that do not serve you, or your marriage.
Sweet friend, how can I pray over you and your marriage today? Share in the comments or email me directly!
In the midst of the thickness, it can be very difficult to grab a hold of truth. We have to train our brains to take every thought captive and choose instead to focus on things that are "true, pure, lovely, and praise-worthy".
Here are three truths for you to focus on in those times.
1. God is GOOD.
It's important to remember this first, because everything else flows out of it. Everything God does is out of His goodness and love. He IS love. He created love, He created goodness, and He embodies them entirely. Every decision He makes, every situation He allows, is because He is GOOD. Just because you don't agree with what's happening, just because it might be painful, does not mean He isn't good. You can't possibly know what the alternatives were that the enemy was attempting to throw at you. Trust in God's goodness, that what He gives you and allows is so much better than any alternative.
2. God is WISE.
We'd like to think we have all the answers and know what's best, but God knows better. He knows HOW to fix everything. Although sometimes it seems like He's not fixing things, or at least not at the speed we'd like, we have to look back at the first point - He is GOOD. Yes, He knows the WISE choice for every situation, and He knows the GOOD choice for every situation.
3. God is STRONG.
Sometimes we can know that God is good, and we know He is wise, but we lack belief that He is strong enough to pull it off. Friend, God created strength. He IS pure strength! Not only is He wise enough and good enough to know what the best decisions are for us, but He is STRONG enough to carry out any task that is necessary. HE CAN DO IT.
If we can focus our hearts on these three things when we're struggling, our faith will grow and we will be able to watch miracle after miracle take place in our lives.
Friend, which of these three truths are you struggling with today?
Which one is the easiest for you to believe?
Let me know how I can pray for you today!
Do you need a miracle right now, in some area of your life?
Are your finances in disarray, is your marriage in shambles, do you need a situation to be turned around completely?
In 2 Kings 4:1-7, we read about a woman who needed a miracle. Her husband had died, and a creditor was coming to take her two sons as slaves. She had nothing.
What can we learn from her story?
1. Seek godly counsel.
This wise woman sought counsel from the prophet Elisha. She didn't just go vent to her friends, or complain on the internet about her creditors and how cruel they were. She knew there was a man who knew God who could guide her in a righteous manner.
2. Obey.
When Elisha told her to go ask for a bunch of jars from her neighbors, she didn't ask why. It seemed an odd request, when all she currently had in her home was one single jar of oil, to gather a bunch more, "not too few" as he instructed. She did as he asked, and made sure her sons obeyed as well. She was an example to them of diligent and immediate obedience. There was no hesitation or questioning. {Side note: always, always weigh counsel against the Word of God - if you're being asked to sin or do anything that contradicts scripture, this is not godly counsel.}
3. Watch and wait.
As she poured into the jars, one after another, she saw them continue to fill with oil until she ran out of jars - not oil. God provided as much oil as for the amount of jars the widow collected. No more, no less. And once they were filled, she was able to pay off all of her debts and live on the remainder with her sons - after she did additional work of selling the jars of oil.
Miracle accomplished!
Notice that God didn't just grant her request in a split second, the way we'd like sometimes.
Her obedience was necessary for the miracle to be carried out.
Friend, what miracle do you need today? Have you asked God what it is He wants you to do in order to carry out His will?
I would love to cover you in prayer. Please share with me how I can pray with you, either in the comments or sending me a message.
