Imagine this: we’re sitting across from each other, coffee in hand, chatting about life and marriage.
You tell me you want a stronger, more joyful connection with your husband, but you’re not sure where to start.
I get it—it can feel overwhelming.
Even if you have a wonderful marriage, the idea of working towards improvement can feel daunting. (Actually, if you have a wonderful marriage, it may feel even more daunting!)
But here’s the good news: transformation doesn’t have to be complicated. It starts with small, intentional steps - rooted in God’s Word.
5 Practices To Start Today
First, let’s talk about gratitude. Each morning, jot down one thing you appreciate about your husband. It could be something as simple as how he goes to work every day to provide for your family, or how he always takes out the trash without being asked. Maybe it's his ability to make you laugh, or how dedicated he is to his children. Gratitude shifts your focus from what’s lacking to what’s good, and it sets the tone for a day filled with grace.
Next, carve out five minutes to pray specifically for your marriage. Ask God for wisdom, patience, and a heart that’s open to change. Look up passages about marriage, and pray those things over your own. When you anchor your prayers in Scripture, you’re not just talking to God—you’re inviting His truth to transform you from the inside out.
Another game-changer? Active listening. When your husband speaks, resist the urge to interrupt or plan your response. Just listen. This simple act builds trust and connection, showing him that his words—and his heart—matter to you.
And when frustrations arise (because let’s be real, they will), pause and choose grace over grumbling. Ask yourself, “How can I respond with kindness instead of criticism?” It’s not always easy, but staying rooted in God’s Word equips you to respond in ways that reflect His love. Don't expect to respond with love if you aren't being filled with God's love daily through studying His Word.
Finally, create moments of connection. Plan one intentional act of kindness each week—whether it’s leaving a note of encouragement, cooking his favorite meal, grabbing a snack he loves while you're grocery shopping, or planning a date night (even if he never does - maybe it's your gift to give). These small gestures speak volumes and remind both of you why you chose each other.
Here’s the thing: when you stay rooted in Scripture, these steps don’t feel like a chore. They become a joy. They become part of who you are—a wife transformed by God’s truth.
Ready to take the next step? Getting into a daily rhythm of reading and actively studying God's Word is how you will experience this transformation.
Download the free 4-week Marriage Scripture Journal and start your journey today. It’s packed with guided readings and prompts to help you anchor your heart in God’s Word and see transformation first in your heart, and then in your marriage.
Let’s do this together.
There’s no greater picture of forgiveness than the cross.
As Jesus hung there, suffering for our sins, He spoke words that still shake me to the core (Luke 23:34):
"Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do"
If Jesus could extend that kind of mercy in His darkest moment, what does that mean for us in our everyday lives—especially in marriage and motherhood?
Forgiveness is hard. When your husband says something hurtful, when your kids push every button you have, when a friend disappoints or hurts you—it’s easy to hold onto resentment.
But sweet friend, withholding forgiveness, hanging on to that resentment and the bitterness that results, only keeps you in bondage.
Jesus didn’t just forgive to be nice; He forgave to set us free. And He calls us to do the same.
In marriage, forgiveness is crucial.
Regardless of how wonderful your husband may be, he will mess up—just like you do.
Choosing to forgive, rather than keeping score, creates an environment of grace where love can thrive.
A practical step? Instead of rehashing past wrongs, choose to focus on solutions and moving forward together.
I know what you might be thinking: "What if he just keeps doing the same thing over and over again?"
That's an entirely different topic, but let's touch on it real quick.
If it's a true sin issue where he is unrepentant, like looking at porn, cheating, getting drunk every night, abuse, or other things that are clear-cut sins, I would encourage you to seek wise, godly, biblical counseling. There are different nuances within each of those issues that go deeper than I can discuss in a blog post.
If it's a personal conviction - or even just personal preference - issue where you don't want him to do something (or TO do something) that he doesn't keep up, I would encourage you to seek God and ask if this is a situation where He is asking YOU to change. Your husband's convictions will likely be different from your own on many topics. You may feel convicted about living a clean, toxin free lifestyle; he may not feel convicted to prioritize that.
Listen, I will be real with you and say this one is a STRUGGLE for me. While it doesn't necessarily require me to forgive my husband, it DOES require me to continue treating him with respect, honor, and love, despite any aggravation I may feel because he's not doing the things I feel convicted that he should be doing.
If you're experiencing anything like that, please reach out to me - I would be honored to walk through this with you and offer any biblical wisdom or godly counsel that I am able.
As moms, we can also model forgiveness for our children.
When they see you forgive quickly and extend grace, they learn to do the same.
A simple way to practice this is by apologizing when you lose our temper or forget to follow through on something, showing them that grace isn’t just something you talk about—it’s something you live.
This also gives them an opportunity to practice forgiveness themselves.
And I can hear another question you might be asking: what if the other person hasn't asked for forgiveness?
Romans 5:8 tells us:
"but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us."
You didn't ask for forgiveness before Christ gave His life for you.
There are so many others who have been offered forgiveness in Christ that have not asked for His forgiveness - yet it is still extended, available to them, offered freely.
The forgiveness you give FREES YOU from bitterness, resentment, anxiety, anger, and the actual physical manifestations of those things that can wreak havoc on your body and ruin your ability to live out God's will for you.
Let's deal with another question: does forgiveness require me to reconcile?
If the other person is unrepentant in their sin, and maintaining a relationship with them puts you in a situation that is dangerous (emotionally, physically, spiritually), then NO - you are not required to reconcile. Reconciliation takes two people works towards a shared goal of unity in the relationship.
If the other person is repentant and actively desiring reconciliation, and you see fruit of the repentance in their life indicating that a relationship with them could be safe, then I would encourage you to prayerfully consider reconciling with them. Depending on the severity of the sin committed against you, this is absolutely something you will need to seek God's guidance in.
The cross teaches us that forgiveness is powerful. It breaks chains, heals wounds, and brings peace.
As a response to our Easter celebration two weeks ago, focusing on Christ's resurrection, let’s ask God to soften our hearts and help us walk in the freedom that comes with forgiving as we have been forgiven.
When we think of Easter, we usually think of that one Sunday each year when we celebrate the resurrection of Christ.
We know His resurrection means new life, so we celebrate with eggs, chicks, bunnies, and flowers, all the things that evoke feelings of freshness, newness, and beginnings.
After that one day is over though...then what?
The resurrection of Jesus invites us into a whole new way of living—every single day.
Romans 6:4 tells us,
Just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life.
And there's the question...what does it actually mean to walk in newness of life when we’re knee-deep in laundry, tantrums, marriage difficulties, and the never-ending cycle of responsibilities?
What does this look like, day in and day out? When nothing feels new anymore, but instead you just feel stuck and stale?
Walking in newness of life starts with a mindset shift.
Instead of waking up dreading the demands of the day, you can wake up intentionally thinking about the truth that you are a daughter of the risen King.
The same power that raised Jesus from the dead lives in YOU, giving you strength to meet those demands - to love your husband well, have patience for your kids, and find joy in the mundane.
Those are all fruits of the Spirit, and if you are intentional about growing in Christ, those fruits will be grown and developed in you.
One practical way to develop this mindset is by renewing your mind daily through Scripture.
The enemy wants you to believe that you're stuck in your bad habits, your overwhelmed schedule, your frustrations, hormone imbalances, and your struggles.
But when you fill your mind with God’s truth, you're reminded that you're a new creation (2 Corinthians 5:17) and that His mercies are new every morning (Lamentations 3:22-23).
What does this look like, to fill your mind with God's truth?
Waking up anywhere from 5 minutes to an hour earlier to prioritize God in your life by reading and deeply studying His Word, recognizing that He alone is the source of your strength and ability to walk in newness of life each day - but if you don't spend TIME with Him, you aren't accessing the strength, joy, and growth He offers you.
If you have no idea where to even start reading the Bible, or how to study it, please reach out to me! God has given me such a deep desire to help teach and guide women in learning how to read and study His Word, and I would be happy to walk alongside you.
Another way to walk in newness of life is by choosing joy.
Instead of getting caught up in frustration, you can make the intentional choice to pause, breathe, take your thoughts captive, and remind yourself that Jesus is alive—and that reality changes everything.
A simple habit of starting the day with gratitude or ending it with a quick reflection on how you saw God’s goodness can make a huge difference.
Grab a simple dollar store journal to keep at your bedside so you can jot a few things down when you wake up, or before you head to bed each night.
Every day is a chance to live differently because of what Jesus has done.
Let’s not just celebrate the resurrection one Sunday a year—let’s walk in that newness of life every single day.
Tell me: what are some ways you intentionally walk in newness of life each day?
Easter isn’t just a once-a-year celebration; it’s the foundation of our faith.
The resurrection of Jesus changed everything—it brought hope, freedom, and the promise of new life.
But if we’re honest, it’s easy to lose sight of that hope in the middle of everyday struggles.
Between the endless to-do lists, the weight of responsibilities as a wife and mom, and the frustrations that come with marriage and parenting, we can feel drained - and hopeless.
So how do we truly live in the hope of the resurrection daily?
The key is remembering that Jesus’ victory is your victory.
When He rose, He conquered sin, shame, and despair—things that often keep us stuck.
That means you don’t have to stay trapped in guilt over your shortcomings, frustration over your husband’s habits, or weariness from the demands of motherhood.
You can choose to stay trapped, by focusing on those things rather than focusing on Christ.
His resurrection power is at work in you, giving you strength for each new day. When you make THAT your focus, like the hymn says, "And the things of earth will grow strangely dim, in the light of His glory and grace."
So what does this look like in real life?
First, it means intentionally shifting your focus from your circumstances to Christ.
When challenges arise, take a moment to remind yourself: Jesus is alive, and because of that, I have hope.
It's pride that causes us to focus so much on ourselves, our own comfort, our own joy...having things our own way.
But when you intentionally choose to think about Jesus, Who He is and what He's done, along with choosing to think about Philippians 4:8 things that are pure, lovely, true, and praiseworthy, you will begin to see a tremendous shift in your heart and attitude.
Second, fill your mind with Scripture.
Read the Bible daily, discover new methods of studying the Bible so you can find the one that connects with your style of learning, and make that habit a priority.
Listen to sermons from wise, godly pastors, or podcasts from older, godly women.
Meditate on Scripture; verses like Romans 8:11 (“The Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you”) remind you that you have access to His strength.
Lastly, practice gratitude.
The resurrection is the ultimate proof of God’s love and power, and daily thanksgiving shifts your perspective from frustration to faith.
Living in the hope of the resurrection isn’t about waiting for perfect circumstances.
It’s about anchoring your heart in the truth that Jesus is alive and at work in you - not by your strength, but by HIS.
As you embrace that, you'll walk in greater joy, peace, and confidence in your roles as wife, mom, daughter, friend, and everything in between.
You know what time it is...
Spring cleaning season is here, and while you may be busy dusting shelves and tossing out clutter, have you paused to consider that your heart might need a little decluttering, too?
Just like a messy home can make it hard to find peace, a heart weighed down by sin, distractions, or unaddressed emotions can keep you from walking closely with God - which in turn can wreak havoc on your marriage.
Hebrews 12:1 tells us to
lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us.
This is an instruction, which indicates that we have control over whether or not we do this.
If we want a deeper, more intimate relationship with the Lord, and a stronger, healthier marriage, we have to make space for God by intentionally, purposefully, obediently letting go of the things that get in the way.
Maybe you're struggling with bitterness or unrealistic expectations toward your husband; a grudge you’re holding against a friend; or just the never-ending to-do list that keeps pushing time with God to the bottom of it (which means it rarely, if ever, happens).
Whatever it is, there are some steps you can take to declutter the things in your heart that aren't serving you, your faith, or your family, and free up some space to invite Christ to fill you with godliness and fruits of the Spirit.
The first step in decluttering your heart is identifying what’s there.
You can do this by prioritizing your time studying Scripture.
When you spend intentional time in the Word, the Holy Spirit brings to light the things you need to surrender (Psalm 139:23-24).
If you don’t make space for Scripture in your life (daily if possible), you won’t even recognize the clutter you're carrying.
Spend time reading and studying the Bible, and then take a few minutes to journal out a few things you feel the Spirit is revealing to you that you need to let go of.
The next step is to actively let go of sin and negativity.
This is where you apply what you study.
If God’s Word calls you to forgive, you forgive. If it calls you to trust instead of worry, you surrender your anxieties in prayer (Philippians 4:6-7).
It’s not enough to simply acknowledge the clutter; you have to remove it. And just like with physical clutter, this is an ongoing process—not a one-time event.
As you take steps to declutter your heart, you’ll find that your time with the Lord feels more joyful and meaningful, your marriage will benefit from your softened spirit, and your joy in Christ will grow.
The final step is to replace the clutter with fruits of the Spirit.
In Matthew 12:44-45, Jesus tells us:
Then it [the demon] says, ‘I will return to my house from which I came.’ And when it comes, it finds the house empty, swept, and put in order. Then it goes and brings with it seven other spirits more evil than itself, and they enter and dwell there, and the last state of that person is worse than the first.
When you simply try to stop doing or to release something, without replacing it with a godly alternative, you leave your mind, heart, and soul susceptible for the enemy to fill that space with even more clutter.
For example, you can try to stop thinking negative thoughts about your husband, but if you don't replace them with positive thoughts instead, you'll find yourself coming up with all sorts of other destructive assumptions to dwell on.
How do you cultivate the fruits of the Spirit? By practicing the core spiritual disciplines of Bible study, prayer, and worship.
If you need help getting started, I invite you to check out my free Quieting Your Mind Guide. This guide was created to help you learn how to experience deeper, more meaningful and fruitful connection with God in your quiet times.
Make time this week to sit with the Lord and ask Him to show you what needs to go. Then, be obedient in clearing it out and adding spiritual disciplines in so you can walk more freely with Him.
