In the beginning...
I'm sure you know the story. God creates all the things, then He breathes life into man.
He sees the first male as alone, and decides he needs a helper; then He creates woman FROM man.
Notice the reason woman was created was to be a helper. That role wasn't a result of the fall; it was assigned to her prior to the fall.
On the other hand, what WAS a result of the fall was woman's desire "for" her husband - most understood and recognized as her desire to control him.
As a result, one of the most common struggles for wives is the tendency to take control—over the schedule, the parenting decisions, the finances, the way things are done.
But underneath that need to control is often fear. Fear of failure, fear of chaos, or fear that things won’t go “right” unless she steps in (which - SPOILER - is also a HUGE indication of pride).
But God doesn’t call you to live from a place of fear. He calls you to trust Him—and one way that trust shows up is in how you relate to your husband.
When you spend time renewing your mind in Scripture, you begin to release the tight grip of control and instead gain quiet, Christ-centered confidence.
Confidence in the Lord allows you to respond with grace when your husband leads differently than you would.
I've heard it said that the measure of a woman's trust in God can be seen in how she submits to her husband.
Trusting the Lord helps you speak with wisdom instead of worry. It builds your ability to communicate with love rather than criticism. And most importantly, it strengthens your faith in God’s sovereignty over your home and marriage.
Practical steps in this area might include:
- Choosing not to "correct" every small thing your husband does differently than you.
- Praying before giving your opinion in a tense conversation.
- Trusting your husband with a parenting or financial decision—and supporting him, even if it’s not what you would do.
- Respecting your husband's decisions - even if you think they're completely wrong - because you know God can protect and guide your family THROUGH any decision, wrong or right.
- Meditating on verses like Isaiah 26:3 or Proverbs 3:5–6 that refocus your mind on God’s control, not yours.
Christ-centered confidence isn’t loud, harsh, or forceful. It’s quiet strength that flows from being anchored in the Word.
When you shift from controlling everything to trusting God in everything, your home—and heart—will experience peace like you could never imagine.
Need a little help? Grab the Marriage Scripture Journal—a 4-week guide to help you study full chapters of God’s Word and apply them to your marriage with clarity and confidence.
If you’re in the trenches of motherhood with spit-up on your shoulder, three hours of sleep (on a good night), and a toddler clinging to your leg, I see you.
And I want you to hear me loud and clear: you are not failing if your Bible study doesn’t look like it used to.
This sacred season of motherhood—yes, even in its exhaustion—is one the Lord sees.
He’s not asking for quiet time perfection. He’s inviting you into communion, however messy or short it may be.
Isaiah 40:11 says,
“He will tend his flock like a shepherd; he will gather the lambs in his arms; he will carry them in his bosom, and gently lead those that are with young.” (emphasis mine)
What a sweet picture of His gentleness with mothers.
Maybe right now, your study looks like meditating on one verse all day.
Write it on a sticky note and put it on your bathroom mirror or the fridge. Use feeding times or nap rocking as moments to pray that verse or ask the Lord to help you understand it more deeply.
Listen to an audio Bible while folding laundry or playing blocks on the floor (bonus: your kids hear it then too!).
Hang Scripture verse cards in your home where you’ll see them often.
Music counts too! Sing hymns over your home and your heart while loading or unloading the dishwasher.
Quick wins for this season:
- Pick one verse a day and meditate on it (work on memorization, look up the context and make sure you understand the author's intention and meaning so you meditate on truth rather than opinion or incorrect interpretation)
- Use audio Bibles—play it in the background while you’re nursing or changing diapers
- Stick Scripture cards around the house for bite-sized truth
- Pray Scripture during feedings or even during midnight wake-ups (have you seen my Titus 2 or 1 Peter Prayer Cards?)
Most importantly: give yourself grace.
God is not grading your Bible study. He simply desires for your heart to prioritize Him. Even five minutes with the Lord can change your entire day when it’s done in faith.
Let Matthew 11:28 remind you that Jesus beckons you:
“Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.”
If you feel like you're reading for a more structured Bible study, reach out to me! I have been praying over the idea of offering customized Bible study plans, based on your style of learning, the time you have available, and what you'd like to study. This would also be an opportunity to learn new Bible study methods to help you dig in deeper.
In the meantime, check out the other digital tools available, and let me know what ONE thing you'll do today to prioritize God in your day!
There’s no greater picture of forgiveness than the cross.
As Jesus hung there, suffering for our sins, He spoke words that still shake me to the core (Luke 23:34):
"Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do"
If Jesus could extend that kind of mercy in His darkest moment, what does that mean for us in our everyday lives—especially in marriage and motherhood?
Forgiveness is hard. When your husband says something hurtful, when your kids push every button you have, when a friend disappoints or hurts you—it’s easy to hold onto resentment.
But sweet friend, withholding forgiveness, hanging on to that resentment and the bitterness that results, only keeps you in bondage.
Jesus didn’t just forgive to be nice; He forgave to set us free. And He calls us to do the same.
In marriage, forgiveness is crucial.
Regardless of how wonderful your husband may be, he will mess up—just like you do.
Choosing to forgive, rather than keeping score, creates an environment of grace where love can thrive.
A practical step? Instead of rehashing past wrongs, choose to focus on solutions and moving forward together.
I know what you might be thinking: "What if he just keeps doing the same thing over and over again?"
That's an entirely different topic, but let's touch on it real quick.
If it's a true sin issue where he is unrepentant, like looking at porn, cheating, getting drunk every night, abuse, or other things that are clear-cut sins, I would encourage you to seek wise, godly, biblical counseling. There are different nuances within each of those issues that go deeper than I can discuss in a blog post.
If it's a personal conviction - or even just personal preference - issue where you don't want him to do something (or TO do something) that he doesn't keep up, I would encourage you to seek God and ask if this is a situation where He is asking YOU to change. Your husband's convictions will likely be different from your own on many topics. You may feel convicted about living a clean, toxin free lifestyle; he may not feel convicted to prioritize that.
Listen, I will be real with you and say this one is a STRUGGLE for me. While it doesn't necessarily require me to forgive my husband, it DOES require me to continue treating him with respect, honor, and love, despite any aggravation I may feel because he's not doing the things I feel convicted that he should be doing.
If you're experiencing anything like that, please reach out to me - I would be honored to walk through this with you and offer any biblical wisdom or godly counsel that I am able.
As moms, we can also model forgiveness for our children.
When they see you forgive quickly and extend grace, they learn to do the same.
A simple way to practice this is by apologizing when you lose our temper or forget to follow through on something, showing them that grace isn’t just something you talk about—it’s something you live.
This also gives them an opportunity to practice forgiveness themselves.
And I can hear another question you might be asking: what if the other person hasn't asked for forgiveness?
Romans 5:8 tells us:
"but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us."
You didn't ask for forgiveness before Christ gave His life for you.
There are so many others who have been offered forgiveness in Christ that have not asked for His forgiveness - yet it is still extended, available to them, offered freely.
The forgiveness you give FREES YOU from bitterness, resentment, anxiety, anger, and the actual physical manifestations of those things that can wreak havoc on your body and ruin your ability to live out God's will for you.
Let's deal with another question: does forgiveness require me to reconcile?
If the other person is unrepentant in their sin, and maintaining a relationship with them puts you in a situation that is dangerous (emotionally, physically, spiritually), then NO - you are not required to reconcile. Reconciliation takes two people works towards a shared goal of unity in the relationship.
If the other person is repentant and actively desiring reconciliation, and you see fruit of the repentance in their life indicating that a relationship with them could be safe, then I would encourage you to prayerfully consider reconciling with them. Depending on the severity of the sin committed against you, this is absolutely something you will need to seek God's guidance in.
The cross teaches us that forgiveness is powerful. It breaks chains, heals wounds, and brings peace.
As a response to our Easter celebration two weeks ago, focusing on Christ's resurrection, let’s ask God to soften our hearts and help us walk in the freedom that comes with forgiving as we have been forgiven.
When we think of Easter, we usually think of that one Sunday each year when we celebrate the resurrection of Christ.
We know His resurrection means new life, so we celebrate with eggs, chicks, bunnies, and flowers, all the things that evoke feelings of freshness, newness, and beginnings.
After that one day is over though...then what?
The resurrection of Jesus invites us into a whole new way of living—every single day.
Romans 6:4 tells us,
Just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life.
And there's the question...what does it actually mean to walk in newness of life when we’re knee-deep in laundry, tantrums, marriage difficulties, and the never-ending cycle of responsibilities?
What does this look like, day in and day out? When nothing feels new anymore, but instead you just feel stuck and stale?
Walking in newness of life starts with a mindset shift.
Instead of waking up dreading the demands of the day, you can wake up intentionally thinking about the truth that you are a daughter of the risen King.
The same power that raised Jesus from the dead lives in YOU, giving you strength to meet those demands - to love your husband well, have patience for your kids, and find joy in the mundane.
Those are all fruits of the Spirit, and if you are intentional about growing in Christ, those fruits will be grown and developed in you.
One practical way to develop this mindset is by renewing your mind daily through Scripture.
The enemy wants you to believe that you're stuck in your bad habits, your overwhelmed schedule, your frustrations, hormone imbalances, and your struggles.
But when you fill your mind with God’s truth, you're reminded that you're a new creation (2 Corinthians 5:17) and that His mercies are new every morning (Lamentations 3:22-23).
What does this look like, to fill your mind with God's truth?
Waking up anywhere from 5 minutes to an hour earlier to prioritize God in your life by reading and deeply studying His Word, recognizing that He alone is the source of your strength and ability to walk in newness of life each day - but if you don't spend TIME with Him, you aren't accessing the strength, joy, and growth He offers you.
If you have no idea where to even start reading the Bible, or how to study it, please reach out to me! God has given me such a deep desire to help teach and guide women in learning how to read and study His Word, and I would be happy to walk alongside you.
Another way to walk in newness of life is by choosing joy.
Instead of getting caught up in frustration, you can make the intentional choice to pause, breathe, take your thoughts captive, and remind yourself that Jesus is alive—and that reality changes everything.
A simple habit of starting the day with gratitude or ending it with a quick reflection on how you saw God’s goodness can make a huge difference.
Grab a simple dollar store journal to keep at your bedside so you can jot a few things down when you wake up, or before you head to bed each night.
Every day is a chance to live differently because of what Jesus has done.
Let’s not just celebrate the resurrection one Sunday a year—let’s walk in that newness of life every single day.
Tell me: what are some ways you intentionally walk in newness of life each day?
Now that we're well into Spring, and Easter is on the horizon, there's a good chance you're either planning your Resurrection Day celebration dinner with family, your Easter Egg hunts, or you're just trying to stop sneezing and be able to breathe with all the pollen. (Maybe that last one is just me.)
I'd like to invite you to consider something different about this season of Easter.
Easter is all about new beginnings. Jesus didn’t stay in the tomb—He rose to bring new life, a life in eternal glory with Him!
And just like He brought renewal to the world, He is able to bring renewal to our marriages too.
Let’s be real—marriage can feel stale at times.
The daily grind of life, unspoken frustrations, and the busyness of raising kids can take a toll. All of a sudden you realize - marriage feels HARD.
So how can you experience the fresh renewal that Easter represents in your marriage?
First, let’s look at what renewal actually means. It’s not about ignoring issues or pretending things are perfect.
In Romans 12:2, Paul tells us,
Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind
How are we transformed? By the renewal of our minds.
This "renewal" means a change of heart or mind. It requires intention (along with the work of the Holy Spirit - we can do nothing without Him).
According to BibleHub.com, "{Renewal} implies a restoration to a former state or an improvement to a new and better condition."
Did you catch that? A restoration to a former state - when you first got married - or an improvement to a NEW and BETTER condition.
Can you imagine your marriage renewed and even better than it was?!
Renewal comes when we invite Jesus into the broken places and allow Him to breathe new life into them.
Just as He overcame death, He can overcome the struggles in our marriages—whether that’s communication breakdowns, unmet expectations, or emotional distance.
This does require intention on your part. While Jesus is capable of miracles that don't involve action on our part, most of the miracles He performed included others taking on certain tasks as well.
One way to seek renewal in your marriage is through forgiveness.
Jesus’ death and resurrection made way for our sins to be forgiven, and He calls you to extend that same grace to your husband.
Holding onto bitterness keeps you stuck, but choosing to forgive—even when it’s hard—opens the door for healing.
To avoid that bitterness from creeping back in, it's imperative that you develop the habit of thinking the BEST of your husband, rather than assuming the worst. For example, when he forgets something, extend the same grace God offers to you, and assume your husband was simply forgetful, rather than neglectful or uncaring.
Another step is intentionally reconnecting.
Plan a date night (even if you're always the one to plan them - that may be a strength you have that he doesn't, so lean into your strength), leave a sweet note, take on a task that he normally completes or you know he dislikes, or simply take a few moments each day to laugh together.
Small efforts can bring a fresh sense of connection. It's usually those daily, small efforts that get forgotten in the daily busy-ness of life, so they're important to intentionally bring back.
And most importantly, pray for your marriage.
Ask God to renew your love, restore joy, and help you both grow together in Him.
Ask your husband what he is currently praying for, or what he would love to have you pray for him. That simple connection alone, knowing that you're in his corner appealing to God on his behalf, can bring so much restoration to your marriage.
Easter reminds us that nothing is too far gone for Jesus to restore.
As we lean into His resurrection power, we can experience a marriage that isn’t just surviving but thriving.
If you'd like to dive deeper into this, be sure to check out the 7-Day Spring Clean Your Marriage challenge! This is a challenge you can begin at any time - and repeat as often as you'd like - to clear out what isn't working, bring back what used to work, and create new habits that will strengthen and fortify your marriage. Click the link below for more information!
