There’s no greater picture of forgiveness than the cross.
As Jesus hung there, suffering for our sins, He spoke words that still shake me to the core (Luke 23:34):
"Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do"
If Jesus could extend that kind of mercy in His darkest moment, what does that mean for us in our everyday lives—especially in marriage and motherhood?
Forgiveness is hard. When your husband says something hurtful, when your kids push every button you have, when a friend disappoints or hurts you—it’s easy to hold onto resentment.
But sweet friend, withholding forgiveness, hanging on to that resentment and the bitterness that results, only keeps you in bondage.
Jesus didn’t just forgive to be nice; He forgave to set us free. And He calls us to do the same.
In marriage, forgiveness is crucial.
Regardless of how wonderful your husband may be, he will mess up—just like you do.
Choosing to forgive, rather than keeping score, creates an environment of grace where love can thrive.
A practical step? Instead of rehashing past wrongs, choose to focus on solutions and moving forward together.
I know what you might be thinking: "What if he just keeps doing the same thing over and over again?"
That's an entirely different topic, but let's touch on it real quick.
If it's a true sin issue where he is unrepentant, like looking at porn, cheating, getting drunk every night, abuse, or other things that are clear-cut sins, I would encourage you to seek wise, godly, biblical counseling. There are different nuances within each of those issues that go deeper than I can discuss in a blog post.
If it's a personal conviction - or even just personal preference - issue where you don't want him to do something (or TO do something) that he doesn't keep up, I would encourage you to seek God and ask if this is a situation where He is asking YOU to change. Your husband's convictions will likely be different from your own on many topics. You may feel convicted about living a clean, toxin free lifestyle; he may not feel convicted to prioritize that.
Listen, I will be real with you and say this one is a STRUGGLE for me. While it doesn't necessarily require me to forgive my husband, it DOES require me to continue treating him with respect, honor, and love, despite any aggravation I may feel because he's not doing the things I feel convicted that he should be doing.
If you're experiencing anything like that, please reach out to me - I would be honored to walk through this with you and offer any biblical wisdom or godly counsel that I am able.
As moms, we can also model forgiveness for our children.
When they see you forgive quickly and extend grace, they learn to do the same.
A simple way to practice this is by apologizing when you lose our temper or forget to follow through on something, showing them that grace isn’t just something you talk about—it’s something you live.
This also gives them an opportunity to practice forgiveness themselves.
And I can hear another question you might be asking: what if the other person hasn't asked for forgiveness?
Romans 5:8 tells us:
"but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us."
You didn't ask for forgiveness before Christ gave His life for you.
There are so many others who have been offered forgiveness in Christ that have not asked for His forgiveness - yet it is still extended, available to them, offered freely.
The forgiveness you give FREES YOU from bitterness, resentment, anxiety, anger, and the actual physical manifestations of those things that can wreak havoc on your body and ruin your ability to live out God's will for you.
Let's deal with another question: does forgiveness require me to reconcile?
If the other person is unrepentant in their sin, and maintaining a relationship with them puts you in a situation that is dangerous (emotionally, physically, spiritually), then NO - you are not required to reconcile. Reconciliation takes two people works towards a shared goal of unity in the relationship.
If the other person is repentant and actively desiring reconciliation, and you see fruit of the repentance in their life indicating that a relationship with them could be safe, then I would encourage you to prayerfully consider reconciling with them. Depending on the severity of the sin committed against you, this is absolutely something you will need to seek God's guidance in.
The cross teaches us that forgiveness is powerful. It breaks chains, heals wounds, and brings peace.
As a response to our Easter celebration two weeks ago, focusing on Christ's resurrection, let’s ask God to soften our hearts and help us walk in the freedom that comes with forgiving as we have been forgiven.
Now that we're well into Spring, and Easter is on the horizon, there's a good chance you're either planning your Resurrection Day celebration dinner with family, your Easter Egg hunts, or you're just trying to stop sneezing and be able to breathe with all the pollen. (Maybe that last one is just me.)
I'd like to invite you to consider something different about this season of Easter.
Easter is all about new beginnings. Jesus didn’t stay in the tomb—He rose to bring new life, a life in eternal glory with Him!
And just like He brought renewal to the world, He is able to bring renewal to our marriages too.
Let’s be real—marriage can feel stale at times.
The daily grind of life, unspoken frustrations, and the busyness of raising kids can take a toll. All of a sudden you realize - marriage feels HARD.
So how can you experience the fresh renewal that Easter represents in your marriage?
First, let’s look at what renewal actually means. It’s not about ignoring issues or pretending things are perfect.
In Romans 12:2, Paul tells us,
Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind
How are we transformed? By the renewal of our minds.
This "renewal" means a change of heart or mind. It requires intention (along with the work of the Holy Spirit - we can do nothing without Him).
According to BibleHub.com, "{Renewal} implies a restoration to a former state or an improvement to a new and better condition."
Did you catch that? A restoration to a former state - when you first got married - or an improvement to a NEW and BETTER condition.
Can you imagine your marriage renewed and even better than it was?!
Renewal comes when we invite Jesus into the broken places and allow Him to breathe new life into them.
Just as He overcame death, He can overcome the struggles in our marriages—whether that’s communication breakdowns, unmet expectations, or emotional distance.
This does require intention on your part. While Jesus is capable of miracles that don't involve action on our part, most of the miracles He performed included others taking on certain tasks as well.
One way to seek renewal in your marriage is through forgiveness.
Jesus’ death and resurrection made way for our sins to be forgiven, and He calls you to extend that same grace to your husband.
Holding onto bitterness keeps you stuck, but choosing to forgive—even when it’s hard—opens the door for healing.
To avoid that bitterness from creeping back in, it's imperative that you develop the habit of thinking the BEST of your husband, rather than assuming the worst. For example, when he forgets something, extend the same grace God offers to you, and assume your husband was simply forgetful, rather than neglectful or uncaring.
Another step is intentionally reconnecting.
Plan a date night (even if you're always the one to plan them - that may be a strength you have that he doesn't, so lean into your strength), leave a sweet note, take on a task that he normally completes or you know he dislikes, or simply take a few moments each day to laugh together.
Small efforts can bring a fresh sense of connection. It's usually those daily, small efforts that get forgotten in the daily busy-ness of life, so they're important to intentionally bring back.
And most importantly, pray for your marriage.
Ask God to renew your love, restore joy, and help you both grow together in Him.
Ask your husband what he is currently praying for, or what he would love to have you pray for him. That simple connection alone, knowing that you're in his corner appealing to God on his behalf, can bring so much restoration to your marriage.
Easter reminds us that nothing is too far gone for Jesus to restore.
As we lean into His resurrection power, we can experience a marriage that isn’t just surviving but thriving.
If you'd like to dive deeper into this, be sure to check out the 7-Day Spring Clean Your Marriage challenge! This is a challenge you can begin at any time - and repeat as often as you'd like - to clear out what isn't working, bring back what used to work, and create new habits that will strengthen and fortify your marriage. Click the link below for more information!
We’ve spent this past month of March talking about spring cleaning—decluttering our hearts, our marriages, and even our Bible study routines.
And sweet friend, if you’re anything like me, you may have uncovered some things that you weren’t expecting (or maybe you were, but you were hoping you wouldn't see!).
🧹Maybe as you dug into your marriage, you realized there’s been some lingering resentment you haven’t fully released.
🧹Maybe in your heart, God revealed places where bitterness or pride have taken root.
🧹Maybe in your Bible study, you’ve noticed that your time with the Lord has been more about checking off a box than actually growing in knowledge of and intimacy with Him.
Spring cleaning is important—it makes space for what truly matters.
But here’s the thing: clearing out isn’t the final step. It’s what comes next that really changes things.
After we’ve emptied our hearts of clutter, we need to intentionally fill them with the things of Christ.
That’s what April is all about. Renewal. New life. Walking in the fullness of what God has for us.
Because if we don’t allow God to renew and refresh us, we’ll end up right back where we started—cluttered, overwhelmed, and spiritually stagnant.
So today, let’s talk about how to take the next step. How do we move from just cleaning to truly renewing our hearts, our marriages, and our faith?
1. Renewing Your Heart: Replacing Lies with Truth
One of the biggest barriers to renewal is the lies we believe. Lies like:
❌ I’m not a good enough wife or mom.
❌ My marriage will never change.
❌ I’ll never be consistent in my faith.
❌ I’m not a good enough wife or mom.
❌ My marriage will never change.
❌ I’ll never be consistent in my faith.
These thoughts may feel true, but friend, they are straight from the enemy.
The best way to renew your heart is to replace these lies with God’s truth:
✅ God’s grace is sufficient for me (2 Corinthians 12:9).
✅ God can restore what is broken (Joel 2:25).
✅ God is working in me to grow and strengthen my faith (Philippians 1:6).
✅ God can restore what is broken (Joel 2:25).
✅ God is working in me to grow and strengthen my faith (Philippians 1:6).
Action Step: Start a “truth journal.” Each morning, write down one lie you’ve been believing and then write the truth from Scripture that replaces it. When you feel yourself slipping back into those old thoughts, go back and read the truth.
2. Renewing Your Marriage: Cultivating Grace and Forgiveness
Spring cleaning your marriage may have brought up some things you didn’t love—old arguments, unresolved hurts, or just the weight of the daily grind pulling you apart instead of together.
Renewal in marriage means learning to release and refill.
Release the offenses you’ve been holding onto. Refill your marriage with grace, kindness, and intentional love.
Ephesians 4:32 says,
Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.
We cannot move forward in a thriving marriage if we’re still clinging to past offenses.
Action Step: Choose one way to actively bless your husband today, regardless of how you feel. Maybe it’s making his favorite meal, sending a kind text, or simply choosing to let go of something minor that’s been irritating you. Watch how small acts of grace shift the atmosphere in your home.
3. Renewing Your Faith: Moving from Routine to Relationship
Maybe last month you realized that your Bible study has felt dry or more like a duty than a delight.
Renewing your faith means shifting your perspective from “I have to do this” to “I get to do this.”
Psalm 51:10 says,
Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me.
That’s our prayer. That God wouldn’t just clean out the old but that He would renew our spirits so that we hunger for Him more than before.
Action Step: This week, try something new in your quiet time. If you always read devotionals, spend time in just the Word. If you typically just read a chapter (or several), try using a study method like S.O.A.P. or Verse Mapping to breathe new insight into your reading. If you always study alone, invite a friend to study with you. Shake things up and invite God to bring fresh excitement to your time with Him.
Let’s Step into the Newness of Life
Cleaning out is good, but filling up with what is life-giving is better.
So as we step into April, let’s not just leave empty spaces where the clutter used to be. Let’s fill those spaces with truth, grace, and renewed passion for Christ.
Friend, God is always in the business of making things new—including you. Let’s step into this next season expecting Him to work in our hearts, our marriages, and our faith.
I’d love to hear from you—what’s one area of your life where you’re asking God for renewal right now? Drop a comment below and let’s encourage each other!
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You know what time it is...
Spring cleaning season is here, and while you may be busy dusting shelves and tossing out clutter, have you paused to consider that your heart might need a little decluttering, too?
Just like a messy home can make it hard to find peace, a heart weighed down by sin, distractions, or unaddressed emotions can keep you from walking closely with God - which in turn can wreak havoc on your marriage.
Hebrews 12:1 tells us to
lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us.
This is an instruction, which indicates that we have control over whether or not we do this.
If we want a deeper, more intimate relationship with the Lord, and a stronger, healthier marriage, we have to make space for God by intentionally, purposefully, obediently letting go of the things that get in the way.
Maybe you're struggling with bitterness or unrealistic expectations toward your husband; a grudge you’re holding against a friend; or just the never-ending to-do list that keeps pushing time with God to the bottom of it (which means it rarely, if ever, happens).
Whatever it is, there are some steps you can take to declutter the things in your heart that aren't serving you, your faith, or your family, and free up some space to invite Christ to fill you with godliness and fruits of the Spirit.
The first step in decluttering your heart is identifying what’s there.
You can do this by prioritizing your time studying Scripture.
When you spend intentional time in the Word, the Holy Spirit brings to light the things you need to surrender (Psalm 139:23-24).
If you don’t make space for Scripture in your life (daily if possible), you won’t even recognize the clutter you're carrying.
Spend time reading and studying the Bible, and then take a few minutes to journal out a few things you feel the Spirit is revealing to you that you need to let go of.
The next step is to actively let go of sin and negativity.
This is where you apply what you study.
If God’s Word calls you to forgive, you forgive. If it calls you to trust instead of worry, you surrender your anxieties in prayer (Philippians 4:6-7).
It’s not enough to simply acknowledge the clutter; you have to remove it. And just like with physical clutter, this is an ongoing process—not a one-time event.
As you take steps to declutter your heart, you’ll find that your time with the Lord feels more joyful and meaningful, your marriage will benefit from your softened spirit, and your joy in Christ will grow.
The final step is to replace the clutter with fruits of the Spirit.
In Matthew 12:44-45, Jesus tells us:
Then it [the demon] says, ‘I will return to my house from which I came.’ And when it comes, it finds the house empty, swept, and put in order. Then it goes and brings with it seven other spirits more evil than itself, and they enter and dwell there, and the last state of that person is worse than the first.
When you simply try to stop doing or to release something, without replacing it with a godly alternative, you leave your mind, heart, and soul susceptible for the enemy to fill that space with even more clutter.
For example, you can try to stop thinking negative thoughts about your husband, but if you don't replace them with positive thoughts instead, you'll find yourself coming up with all sorts of other destructive assumptions to dwell on.
How do you cultivate the fruits of the Spirit? By practicing the core spiritual disciplines of Bible study, prayer, and worship.
If you need help getting started, I invite you to check out my free Quieting Your Mind Guide. This guide was created to help you learn how to experience deeper, more meaningful and fruitful connection with God in your quiet times.
Make time this week to sit with the Lord and ask Him to show you what needs to go. Then, be obedient in clearing it out and adding spiritual disciplines in so you can walk more freely with Him.
Buckle up, buttercup; this topic may get a little bumpy.
Let me first say that if just the title of this post gets your blood boiling, there is clearly some unlearning and biblical learning that needs to happen. I have been there; I get it.
With that note out of the way, let’s chat about something I’ve wrestled with (and I'm sure you have to, unless it's a topic you've been told to ignore): serving my husband.
In our current feminist society, serving your husband is something only weak, controlled, subservient "trad wives" do. The world will tell you that in marriage, you shouldn't have to serve your husband. You should be equals and make each other happy and show mutual respect (some of which is true).
Scripturally, we're called to serve one another as a body of believers:
Galatians 5:13
For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another.
Ephesians 6:7-8
Rendering service with a good will as to the Lord and not to man, knowing that whatever good anyone does, this he will receive back from the Lord, whether he is a slave or free.
Wives are called to submit to their husbands, which in and of itself is service to him. Being a "keeper at home" per Titus 2 is an act of service. When you apply those passages alongside the others that call believers to serve one another, it's obvious wives have a particular role in serving their husbands.
I don't know about you, but as a Christian, my goal is to understand Scripture so that I can apply and OBEY it. Obedience to God is EVERYTHING.
Simply knowing what the Bible says doesn't do us any good if we don't seek to live it out (even the demons acknowledge Jesus; the difference is they don't obey Him).
And so, the quest began to serve my husband out of obedience to Christ.
For a long time, “serving” felt like a chore, something I had to do because I was the wife.
But when I began to understand that serving him was a way to honor God and pour love into my marriage, my perspective shifted.
Serving your husband doesn’t have to mean elaborate meals or Pinterest-worthy gestures (unless that’s your thing - it's definitely not mine).
It can be as simple as asking how you can pray for him or surprising him with his favorite snack (Aldi has great random snack finds!).
The key is doing it with joy, not resentment or obligation.
- When you serve joyfully, it’s like planting seeds of love that will grow over time.
- When you serve joyfully, God is honored and glorified.
- When you serve joyfully, YOU will be more joyful.
- When you serve joyfully, your husband feels more loved and respected.
- When you serve joyfully, you set a biblical example for your children, your friends, and all of those in your circle of influence.
This month, why not make it fun?
Think of creative ways to bless your husband.
- Write him a note each day leading up to Valentine’s, telling him one thing you appreciate about him.
- Plan a date night that focuses on something he loves, even if it’s not your favorite (Top Golf?).
- Take on one of his chores for the day as an act of kindness.
- Rub his shoulders or back, or his legs if he holds tension there.
- Fill a jar with Hershey's hugs and kisses and give him a real one each time he takes out a candy.
- Send him a "meat bouquet" or a "jerky heart".
Remember, serving isn’t about getting something in return. It’s about showing Christ’s love in a tangible way.
And when you do it joyfully, your heart softens, your connection deepens, and your marriage gets a little sweeter.
So grab your planner or a sticky note and jot down some simple ideas to serve your husband today. Little things add up to big love.
Share your ideas in the comments, too! Let's inspire and encourage our sisters in Christ today!
