Do you intentionally think about speaking life to your husband regularly?
We all need to examine our words and whether they're filled with kindness, respect, support, and love.
Scripture speaks often to the power of our tongues and the impact they have on others.
Challenging conversations will need to happen, but we need to understand the importance of speaking life and finding ways to encourage and build up our husbands on a daily basis.
Head over to the full post for more, and some tips to help you do this!
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We've all heard this before:
"I think, therefore I am."
As trite as that is, there is truth in that what we focus on is what takes priority in our hearts and minds.
What you think about, grows.
When you focus on how your husband didn't take out the trash, or didn't take you out for your anniversary, those things will become the most important factors, and your heart will harden towards him.
On the other hand, if you focus on the fact that he goes to work every day to provide for your family, or how he complimented the last meal you cooked, your heart will soften towards him.
BUT - practicing daily gratitude towards your husband is only one factor in cultivating a heart of thanksgiving and a spirit of godly contentment.
We must also focus on Christ as our sufficiency in ALL things.
Sweet friend, if you have given your life to Christ and make it your goal to obey and follow Him, then you know you have a reward coming in heaven.
Christ IS our reward, and we are promised eternity with Him.
Making Him our focus, being grateful for that promise, considering all of His attributes, remembering all of the blessings He's poured out on us - THAT is how we ensure a soft heart that finds contentment in ALL things.
Here's a tangible tip for you: keep multiple gratitude journals.
- One for general gratitude.
- One for thankfulness towards your husband.
- One for appreciation of your children (and bonus kids!).
One November, I kept a gratitude journal for the month for my husband and each of the kids (my bonus kids and my bio daughter). On December 1, I left their journals on their pillows.
Another year, I kept one for my husband for the entire year, from January 1-December 31, and gifted it to him on New Year's Eve.
Intentionally writing down words of thankfulness, focusing on what we appreciate about them, whether it's acts of service they performed or considering a quality about their personality or an attribute they possess, helps us to focus our hearts on things that are true, pure, lovely, and praiseworthy, as Philippians 4:8 instructs us.
Cultivating a heart of daily gratitude is such an important part of growing as a godly wife.
I'd love to hear - have you ever kept a gratitude journal? Is that something you would like to do for your husband or children?
Share in the comments!
If you are struggling to cultivate some good habits that will serve both your walk with Christ and your growth as a wife, I would love for you to join me over the next couple of months to break down the 10 Daily Habits of a Godly Wife that I would encourage you to make a part of your life. Today we're talking about Bible study.
God is our source of ALL things - power, patience, joy, peace, strength, wisdom. When are lacking in any of these areas, it's likely because we are not plugging into Him as our power source.
This must be done daily. Just like your marriage wouldn't work if you only ever talked to your husband for 5 minutes every few days, your relationship with God will not thrive if you only spend a few minutes with him periodically.
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When you're in a difficult season, it's so easy to feel defeated.
- When your child is a prodigal.
- When your marriage is falling apart.
- When your doctor gives you a terrible diagnosis.
- When a loved one dies.
- When you lose a home, a job, or a friendship.
- When finances are tight, or non-existent.
It can be SO easy to think to yourself, "If only this would change, I could be happy. If only..."
What does God have to say about things like this?
First, we are to weep with others when they weep. When you find yourself in a season of weeping, you allow yourself to weep and work through those emotions, and you surround yourself with people who, like Job's friends, will just sit in the weeping with you.
Second, you lean into God as your source of comfort, of relief, and of your JOY.
Scripture tells us in Romans 18:18:
For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us."
It's important to remember that nothing happening to us on earth can compare to the beauty and indescribable joy awaiting us in eternity.
When we get there, nothing here will matter anymore. All that will matter is being in the presence of Jesus.
Yes, it's painful to think about your child rejecting God and missing out on this glory. It's painful to walk through a divorce, or scary medical diagnosis, or a betrayal.
But when you feel as though you need your child's salvation, or your marriage to be a godly marriage, or you need to have all of your bills paid, in order to feel joy, then you have elevated those things ABOVE Jesus.
When you seek something other than Jesus for your joy, you've made that thing an idol.
Christ is sufficient for us.
2 Corinthians 5:8 tells us
And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that having all sufficiency in all things at all times, you may abound in every good work."
We have all sufficiency, in ALL things, at ALL times. And the reason for this is so that we can abound in every good work.
It's difficult to do good works when we're anxious, depressed, waiting on something else to bring us joy, isn't it?
Sweet friend, you don't have to wait to do good. You don't have to wait to find JOY.
Psalm 16:11
You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.
James 1:2-4
Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.
Proverbs 10:28
The hope of the righteous brings joy, but the expectation of the wicked will perish.
When we place our focus on Christ, and recognize His sufficiency and ability to BE our complete joy, we will have that joy in abundance - even when we aren't getting the earthly things we want or think we need.
Can you believe this today?
Can you believe Christ alone is sufficiently able to bring you all joy and peace, regardless of your earthly circumstances?
Comment below and let me know how I can pray over you today.
Romans 12:10 says,
Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves.
As wives, we have a tendency to pull out the verse that says, "Submit to one another" even though it's not in the context of marriage, but when it comes to other verses - like this one telling us to honor one another above ourselves - suddenly it doesn't apply to our husbands anymore.
Do you honor your husband above yourself?
- When you're exhausted at the end of the day, do you consider how exhausted he might be as well?
- When he has to work on Mother's Day, do you think about his frustration that he can't be home with his family, or are you focused on the fact that you aren't getting the day you wanted?
- During a disagreement, do you consider his point of view and try to understand why he feels the way he does, or are you contemplating the next argument you'll make for your case?
It's so, so easy to fall into these human responses, and I will be the first to admit that I fall into them as well.
What God is looking for is a heart willing to recognize those as worldly responses, and willing to reject them for godly ones instead.
He offers us His strength, His love, His grace, His mercy, so that we can set out to accomplish what He's asked of us.
Honoring our husbands above ourselves isn't easy, but it's instructed of us for a reason.
If we want to have a heavenly marriage, we have to be willing to live by heavenly commandments.
I'd love to hear ways that you honor your husband. Share in the comments!
